The Earth Actually Is Flat
There’s growing evidence that the science of Mohammad may once have been right. LandSat has been discovering large areas of Earth that show no curvature whatever but are absolutely flat, indicating that at one time our planet must have been flat as a pancake before it pulled into a ball.
Other News: In a bizarre twist, Britney Spears and Donald Trump have announced their engagement. Mr. Trump will have to divorce his present wife first but apparently they’ve already worked out a generous financial package for the current Mrs. Trump.
Dick Cheney has admitted lying about Iraqs WMDs, and that he shot Harry Whittington while hunting “for telling a bad joke”, after “perhaps” too much drinking.
China announces that it is withdrawing all troops from Tibet and will relocate all Chinese settlers back to China. An apology to Tibet and the Dalai Lama will be forthcoming. Chinese President Hu Jintao stated today that the “Spirit of the Olympics has opened my heart to the truth”.
The FBI has admitted that President Kennedy was assassinated by at least 3 people working in concert and that Lee Harvey Oswald probably was only a decoy.
The Pentagon has revealed that our military is in possession of at least one “UFO”. While not directly referring to them as alien craft, a comment from Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Navy Adm. Mike Mullen that “Reverse engineering has been the biggest problem” is a good indication of their non-Earth origin.
With any luck I should have a lot more to post on these stories by next April 1st.
April 4th, 2008 at 7:17 am
You almost had me with these, but ahem, confidentially speaking, being a former NASA employee, there were TWO crashed flying saucers…can’t say anything more, guys in black clothes are at my door and………………..